Movements, Mates, Meandering Minds and Mangled Missals

In typical African fashion there are still many people who believe that a woman's shining glory should be to whelp out a bunch of brats. But it is good to know that as shown in this article, there are some women who have chosen to go against the grain. Now if you know you are part of the Childfree Movement, do give me a call and we can go out there and build our empire as we enjoy life!

I was talking to my big sister yesterday. She was telling me about how she feels it is important to have someone with you to be your team mate in the game of life, to weather the storms, to rise to the challenges and all that clap trap! Why do I call it clap trap? I agree that it is good to have a mate, but it isn't everything and life isn't unlivable without someone by your side. I think that is because for a long part of my life I was the one who had to be the "man of the house" and over time I got used to doing things by myself or with the help of a few reliable friends (my generals lol). So I got used to bearing alot of the brunts of failure and the joys of success on my own. But that life isn't for everyone, so I can't always knock those who need someone by their side. In spite of this, I think more women should realize that you don't need a special person to go through life, what happens if he never comes? Set up the appropriate support systems in your life, keep on living and forget all that soul mate crap is my piece of advice to all out there!

This week I have been doing some training classes and it is excruciating to say the least! For the last 3 days, I have had to sit in a small class of 12 and be taught for 8 hours with intermittent breaks. The trainer is pretty interesting but not captivating, and unlike high school; there is no-one for me to use for cover so I can sleep (this is a post for some other time). I can't wait till we start computer work because these classes bore me to tears (literally!), I yawned so much that the last time I yawned, so many tears rolled down my cheeks making it look like I had really been moved by the material we were covering in that session. God give me strength to survive the next 2 weeks!

I got this clip from C&D, this dude killed this song! Full marks for trying though!


Prince Phillip Quote of the Day

After accepting a gift off a Kenyan civilian he replied "You are a woman aren't you?"

Race, Relationships and Other Things..........

There are two places where I think that the issue of race is most apparent in my own observation; religion and sex. They call Sunday morning the most segregated time of the week in America. This is because most people will step away from their pretensions of diversity and go worship at their respective churches that are led and attended by people who look and sound just like them. A fully racially diverse church here in the South (I can't speak for up North and other Western Countries) is the exception rather than the rule.

The situation where this is most apparent is porn, headlines like "see amateur co-ed deal with 14 inch monster black cocks, see sexy latina get pounded, big black booty girl , white trash sluts get screwed, tight asian bitch gets wrecked by american dicks." And the list goes on and on. Porn in many ways is a true expression of a people's sexual culture and perceptions. By looking at buttoned up and prim Japanese, who would know that they came up with a concept like Bukakke or the conservative Brits could come up with Movie Buff's all time favourite, soggy biscuit?

I was reading this article in Details magazine online that somehow illustrates my point. A swingers club where black "mandingos" pleasure white men's frumpy wives while the men watch. I have always wondered how a man can let another man have his wife while he watches, I guess it's a white thing. But why couldn't they use some well built white men for that? Well it's because of the perception many white people, educated or otherwise have of black people; insatiable, well endowed sex dynamos.

Another very telling incident was when I helped my friend set up a profile on a popular dating site so she could meet new people, so after the appropriate photoshop work, blurring the pics and all we were good to go. After reading a few of the responses which were mostly from white men in their 30s she decided to take the profile down, some of them would start out by saying stuff like "hello you chocolate thing!, let me be the vanilla in your coffee," profess their love for black women and other race based cliches. It became obvious to me and her that these men were just out to get some brown sugar and not to get to know my friend irregardless of her personality. We all know historically during slavery and during colonization that white men used to have their way with black women and other women of color and many of them still have that colonial hang up where they see them as their own sexual chattels, lesser beings than their own women. After all we know about how many Kenyan women are wooed by their German boyfriends in Kenya and offered a better life abroad only to be turned into sex slaves even before the they have recovered from their jet lag or how Italians have been using children in Malindi to satisfy their prediliction for anal sex (sadly with the collaboration of their impoverished parents), who can forget about all the mixed race children in parts of Maasai land who came as a result of British "Johnies" ambushing any Maasai women they could find? I for one wonder why they don't do the same things in their own countries?

Of course by now we are all aware of the Don Imus saga after her referred to the Rutgers basketball team as nappy headed hos. This man has been a repeat offender with such comments (he once called a black female correspondent a cleaning lady) but I guess his 40 days were over, there is of course the theory that he had been taking his cues from rappers portrayals of black women which we all know leave alot to be desired. But I also do know that many white men who are not rap aficionados don't see past a piece of ebony ass when they see a black woman, I had a friend who dated a white dude; he confessed to her once before they broke up that his dad told him to enjoy screwing her but leave it at that.

To conclude, it isn't that I have anything against inter-racial relations but I do think that before someone jumps off the cliff ( out sources), they should try and find out whether their lover getting into is for all the right reasons or just fulfilling some tawdry race based fantasy. Sad because to be honest I thought we should have moved past the white knight, black mandingo, me love you long time and other racial based sexual stereotypes that are still part prevalent today.

I Have The Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday I watched a video that showed me how much power I have. I initially thought it was a sketch for Madtv or something of the sort, but when I found out it was for real I had to put off the serious post I had lined up so as to share it.
Just in case you youtube take the video down here is another link.



While you watch this video, I will hop hop hop like a jack rabbit since I'm in predator mode and consider working some walls, the middle and hitting the bottom (and to think that her mum was trying not to share that secret!) . Anyway I'm going to let the video speak for itself!
ps: Ladies do not let the penis ejaculate on your brain! Keep up the defences!
pps: Those dudes who shagged this lady must have had some sharp game because she still seems to remember it vividly given her descriptions!

Behold! A Child Is Born!

Once upon a time in a land far away, a woman was in labor about to be blessed with child. This was not her first child so this was not a new experience for her. As she went through the different sensations that a woman undergoes when she is bringing life into the world little did she know that the different moons, stars and suns in the universe had aligned themselves into a new zodiac year. As the child came into the world welcomed by his new family, the universe blessed him with a pioneering, free spirit, intellect laced with impulsiveness. The Universe through a human vessel had brought the Acolyte back into the world once again!

Anyway cheeky origin stories aside, it's my birthday today! I am now one year older. The years go by so fast I must say. How is my life plan going? Other than starting my Master's 2 years late, I'm pretty much on schedule especially for the fact that waiting helped me get an Assistantship so I was able to zoom through it in a year and a half as opposing to having not gotten one; come earlier and having to work my ass off. So in terms of education I am more or less on schedule. I really don't see myself doing a PhD at this point in time, I'd rather focus on my career and finance this point in time. I am behind in the investments part of my life, I did expect to be much further but I do have some good plans in mind that I will put into motion as soon as I get my career on track this year. Relationships? You have been here most of the way during the last 2 years. Other than no kids and no intentions for marriage soon, I don't have any other plans in that arena.

Some Acolyte trivia for you...........

1. The Acolyte loves dogs
2. The Acolyte loves sleeping
3. The Acolyte loves reading interesting novels preferably fiction
4. The Acolyte can be rather sarcastic
5. The Acolyte has not turned 30 this year!
6. The Acolyte would like to make some reliable male friends this year with whom he can do activities with that don't involve alcohol and women.
7. The Acolyte plans to vacation in Kenya in 2008
8. The Acolyte plans to spend less time on-line
9. The Acolyte can't wait to move into his own place in the next few months so he can run do cartwheels, handstands and all the other eccentric things he loves to do in private
10. The Acolyte loves to refer to himself in third person and is gearing up to see what the next year of his life has to bring him. Remember people above all else....choose life!

Problems, Powers and Porn...

After reading Dorothy's blog where she gave her account of living with domestic abuse and commentors added their own experiences, I strongly feel that such billboards should be put up and some sort of awareness/education began. But at the end of the day that is all I can say about the issue, because I don't know what goes on behind closed doors and in people's heads. Anyway my meager knowledge is useless when it comes to this issue, any suggestions people?

Anyway onto more humorous matters! I came across a few of the many testaments to Chuck Norris' manliness online and I have to share them.

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, some of Chuck Norris'
sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus
Prime.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating
pain, the cobra died.

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.

When Chuck Norris exercises, the machine gets stronger.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for
Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."

Chuck Norris' wristwatch has no numbers on it. It just says, "Time to
kick ass! "

Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck
Norris will not take sh_t from anyone.

Chuck Norris once killed a bird by throwing it off a cliff.

Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.

The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't
real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.

The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just
entered a world with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris crossed the road. Nobody has ever dared question his
motives.

Those really cracked me up!

Since I have given my PSA it is now time for a funny piece I found on one of my all time fave soccer blogs! Yes soccer.......

30 things learnt from watching porn

1. Women wear high heels to bed.
2. Men are never impotent.
3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.
5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.
6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.
7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.
8. Women always orgasm when men do.
9. A blowjob will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
10. All women are noisy in bed.
11. People in the 70's couldn't f*** unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.
12. Those tits are real.
13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.
14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum.
15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!)
16. Double penetration makes women smile.
17. Asian men don't exist.
18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.
19. There's a plot.
20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the butt.
21. Nurses suck patient's cocks.
22. Men always pull out.
23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before f***ing the both of you.
24. Women never have headaches... or periods.
25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to "suck it".
26. Assholes are clean.
27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trousers and find a cock there.
29. Men don't have to beg.
30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip.

Yes The Acolyte has just saved you from having to learn the hard way, so don't take me fore granted. An attempt at serious blogging will resume tomorrow