Monday, May 29, 2006

Baby fever or rather lack of....

I find it interesting to read posts by KBW gal members about broodiness or baby fever checking in.Children are a wonderful thing and a blessing from God to be enjoyed. A blessing that I thank God that he has not given me.
Women have a maternal instinct and men have a paternal instinct. In many men this paternal instinct leads them to desire children and makes them seek out a women to raise a family with.I am not one of those men.I have never liked children. No this doesn't mean that I hate children, it just means that I don't get that warm fuzzy feeling inside about children. I don't go "Awwwww" when I see a child learning how to walk and say it's first words ( I leave it to potential baby daddys like Nick).
I have never seen myself as a dad and children have never been a part of my future plans ever since I began taking part in activities that would pass on my genes. So Acolyte-lets have never been part of the equation. Of course there are the naysayers who say that in 10 years your point of view will change. Well they said the same thing about marriage and 10 years later I am still not out wife shopping!So the same thing will apply for kids!To some extent I think that its a family thing as most of my relatives from my Dad's side all have one kid other then my Uncle and they don't like children much (they always refused to babysit any of us and our other cousins from the extended family!).
Of course my mum has made those usual African mother like requests, "When are you going to name me?"To which after laughing at the improbability of it ever happening, I tell her that I'll dedicate a building in her name when I set up my empire!Also it does put a damper on any marriage plans that I may ever have as 99% of women want to have kids,so I don't think any woman will be pleased to know that Aco comes with a no kids condition as part of the package!
Anway moving on,I have never had perfectly aligned teeth and I guess that fact is coming to haunt me!One of my wisdom teeth seems to be ingrown and is now digging into my gums slightly so the back of my mouth was hurting like hell yesterday.It reduced today and a pal gave me the painkiller medicine that is applied onto baby's gums when they are teething (babys aren't so bad after all!).I just hope that the ache goes away, because having to have that teeth removed will put a major dent in my bank account!


akiey said...

...that tooth removed will put a major dent in my bank account

Aco, that's when you look at a kid laughing at everything and think to yourself: "why the heck am I stressing about denting my account when life is meant to be lived one moment at a time?"

Sounds like you've succeded in proving the naysayers wrong on many occasions...but what happens when you hit late 70s and have no one to take care of you? A kid/kids can be a longterm investment if you ask me,lol!

Me I Love Babies said...

wacha wivu....Babies rock....I know I prolly don't want to have any of my own per se....maybe 1 cute girl to dress in pink and 1 hot boy to take care of the sister.......

But, even if I never have mine, there are enough bundles to go around, so I indulge in those.

If you do not ike babies, you might as well start kicking puppies then...pffft!! and I can see you are headed towards girlie posts again......two words for you my friend...Nyanyako Star!

Prousette said...

A patient girl that I am, will give you 10 years and see if you change your mind. Can live with the non-changed mind too.

If you have teen added to your age having children not a priority but when you have that empire who are you going to pass it on to after your demise -taking it for granted that you know you are not permanent this side of the planet? Someone else's child.

For the record I love babies and children ...

acolyte said...

@ Akiey
If you are as broke as I am getting the teeth taken out will hurt both physically and financially!
Well I dont know if you know this, but nowadays children feel nothing for their parents (I do know loads of people who havent talked to their parents in years)!so if you have kids as an insurance policy you'll be shocked when they leave you hanging!
@ KM
I remember you are the mama who had baby fever sometime back plus you do volunteer at orphanages and stuff if I'm not wrong.
The fact I dont like the hustle and hassle that is kids doesn't mean that I hate them.Ebu ishia!
@ Prou
Well you wouldn't be Mama Nyumi if you hated kids!
Well with the wonders of cloning in this day and age who better to take over my empire then...Aco V3.0!

Misisng Maternal Instinct said...

My maternal instincts came to a screeching halt when I saw my friend give birth...

lets jus put it this way, my fallopian tubes tied themselves into little sperm proof knots - as the doc proceeded to inject her with a shindano that looked like was meant for bovines and not humans in her spinal cord to make her numb< nini hii ??

It is with utmost denial that I wish one day that Walmart will start selling babies and I can include two or three in my shopping list

there will be a major medical breakthrough making it possible for men to give birth - to which I shall pollinate and cross pollinate any man in my path !

But until then...I shall look at the tois from afar, much to mother dearests dismay !

acolyte said...

@ thedeviousone
I think you seeing it first hand has snapped you out of the baby fever that most mamas have!
I think there should be a device that gives you kids that are aged 6 years old onwards!
So you stay on call, when I want to get hitched I'll give you a call!

The Devious One said...

Oh boy oh boy !
Aco done proposed !
*extends wedding finger* I'm a ring size four so know what to do !

acolyte said...

@ Deviousone
Sawa, wacha I save and then holla at you as soon as I can afford that big ass rock!

Guessaurus said...

I never say that I will never have kids, but I am not sure I will ever be ready for them - they scare the bejezuz out of me. I dont do those ahhhh and ooohhh when I see kids, and would rather not be near one (yes I said that) although most people believe that I will be an excellent mum... My mommy dearest asked me last month when I was gonna give her a grandchild, and I laughed her out of the room - tihihihi - its that bad - my mom thinks I'm demented.
As for childbirth - I swear someone else will have to go through that if I ever decide to have kids.

I think we should form a club people - and then be ostracised from society...

spicebear said...

i tend to keep away from kids who i can't have a conversation with, that's just me. with the way women are meant to have mothering instinct people find it strange that i refuse to babysit without supervision. well, my mother said she used to absolutely detest children until she got some of her own so although i don't hate kids i see it runs in the genes.

i am leaning heavily towards adoption though, no point in adding more children in the world when some are in dire need of being taken care of. my mother almost fainted, teehee. but as guess said, never say never.

The Devious One said...

@ apice & guess...I think we all think alike when it comes to as for me..I defintely dont mind practicing the act of making tois or as our elders would call it "bad manners"

Ha ha ha ha ha

acolyte said...

@ Guess
I would never have thot you would be one wary of kids!I always figured you as instant mama material!But I think mums of our generation are wondering why many of us have dropped the ball in the kiddies department!As for giving birth I hear it isnt an experience to smile about!
@ spicebear
Seems our club is growing bigger and bigger.I do agree that adoption is a noble thing as there enuff kids out there who need a family without us having to make more!
@ deviousone
Yes,the activities that proceed to jr being born are fun but the 9 months and the 18 years of work sure as hell are not!So I'll stick to the practice too!

Girl next door said...

Cute baby pic! Baby fever seems to be hitting a lot of people lately, and I'm not one of them either. The idea of having someone to take care of you in old age or carry on the legacy kinda makes sense. BUT, I say it's a huge gamble. Many people try to relive their lives and dreams through their kids; it's tempting to think of grooming a person who looks like you and to think like you---but it can backfire seriously. Why else are peroz stressed out about what their offspring does? Many are in denial coz they don't really know their kids. It's a very risky investment. Babies can be great (I guess) but they're not for everyone.

mama mia said...

lol Acolyte ... I wish I could see your face in 10 years when you reread this post ...
I don't know - having one or two kiddies gives one a chance to indulge in the 'finer things in life' ... with a kid tagging along, you get to play 'jumping castles', eat candy floss, paint your face, dunk your cookies, ooh and aah watching tadpoles and other miniscule forms of wildlife, get down and dirty molding clay scupltures, etc etc

Guessaurus said...

@Aco - I know, I am good with kids though - they seem to gravitate towards me even in public - LOLOLOL but I tell you, they are scary. the way they look at you like they can see into your soul - the way they can one minute be smiling at you and the next screaming like you are the devil incarnate. I tell you, kids are weird.

Having said that, I might, just might, one day have one of those.

One of my friends (male) is always telling me to have a kid - he claims it will change my life -- yeah dude, I know it will, drastically, mind.
It is having a human being, a helpless one at that, to look after 24/7 that daunts me - I cant even look after myself properly as it is. *sob sob* I am still a baby myself.

@Mama Mia - your comment up there just put a few more nails in 'our' 'dont like babies' coffin.

acolyte said...

Well trying to have kids to live the dreams that you missed out on is an exercise in futility and very selfish!
@ Mama Mia
What people who read my blog dont seem to understand is how set I am in my ways.There are resolutions and habits that I have held near and dear for over 15 years!And kids dont inspire within me the deep and fuzzy feelings that dogs do!So I guess I'll settle for a couple of pups instead!Plus I feel nothing for those kid friendly activities!
@ Guess
I intimidate kids!The can sense the anti-kid power in me!Plus the whole crying thingie and having to take care of them doesnt appeal to me in the least!Fact is at the end of the day kids do nothing for me!
But for those of you who like kids go ahead and have kiddies on my behalf!

Girl next door said...

Dental issues are rather painful and costly, but if you are anywhere near a dental school--check them out. You can usually get discounted services there from people graduating, teachers demonstrating skills or out of state/international dentists who need a patient for their boards.

acolyte said...

@ Girl Next Door
Thanks for the info!I will check out that option ASAP!

Wanjiku said...

I'm a woman in my mid thirties and I've never wanted kids. Never. Folks thought I was faking it. I got the same maneno ati ten years from now you'll have two kids. I say look at me now!!! Anyway, my thoughts are that not everyone is meant to be a parent. Besides, there's plenty of watus on the planet. From what I hear, poor mother earth has too many watus to support. I think our paros are just a little slow at catching on.

On a different note (sorry for blogging on your blog), every guy I ever dated thought I was nuts about not wanting kids. I made it very clear from the beginning and from my experience, its the guys who want kids more than women. So wacha this mambo ati mamas are broody.

acolyte said...

@ Wanjiku
Well I must admit more and more women have come out of the woodwork and proved me wrong.And for that I am proud!
I believe there are more then enough children on this planet who need good homes without us making more!Too bad for those dudes you dated and your parents!As long as you are happy with what you have, then be happy!