Thursday, December 22, 2005

Big Brother is watching

A nation where the the government listens in on the citizen's phone calls without cause,where financial records are no longer confidential,where any politician who goes against any government action that he thinks is unconstitutional is branded a traitor and where all foreigners are branded enemies of the state and subject to a separate harsher set of laws.No I am not talking about cold war Russia I am talking about the good old U.S of A.Now to add on to this any of you who are thinking of taking part in any organised protest should think again......

Police Infilitrate Protests, Videotapes Show

Published: December 22, 2005

Undercover New York City police officers have conducted covert surveillance in the last 16 months of people protesting the Iraq war, bicycle riders taking part in mass rallies and even mourners at a street vigil for a cyclist killed in an accident, a series of videotapes show.

In glimpses and in glaring detail, the videotape images reveal the robust presence of disguised officers or others working with them at seven public gatherings since August 2004.

The officers hoist protest signs. They hold flowers with mourners. They ride in bicycle events. At the vigil for the cyclist, an officer in biking gear wore a button that said, "I am a shameless agitator." She also carried a camera and videotaped the roughly 15 people present.

Beyond collecting information, some of the undercover officers or their associates are seen on the tape having influence on events. At a demonstration last year during the Republican National Convention, the sham arrest of a man secretly working with the police led to a bruising confrontation between officers in riot gear and bystanders.

Until Sept. 11, the secret monitoring of events where people expressed their opinions was among the most tightly limited of police powers.

Provided with images from the tape, the Police Department's chief spokesman, Paul J. Browne, did not dispute that they showed officers at work but said that disguised officers had always attended such gatherings - not to investigate political activities but to keep order and protect free speech. Activists, however, say that police officers masquerading as protesters and bicycle riders distort their messages and provoke trouble.

The pictures of the undercover officers were culled from an unofficial archive of civilian and police videotapes by Eileen Clancy, a forensic video analyst who is critical of the tactics. She gave the tapes to The New York Times. Based on what the individuals said, the equipment they carried and their almost immediate release after they had been arrested amid protesters or bicycle riders, The Times concluded that at least 10 officers were incognito at the events.

After the 2001 terrorist attacks, officials at all levels of government considered major changes in various police powers. President Bush acknowledged last Saturday that he has secretly permitted the National Security Agency to eavesdrop without a warrant on international telephone calls and e-mail messages in terror investigations.

In New York, the administration of Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg persuaded a federal judge in 2003 to enlarge the Police Department's authority to conduct investigations of political, social and religious groups. "We live in a more dangerous, constantly changing world," Police Commissioner Raymond W. Kelly said.

Before then, very few political organizations or activities were secretly investigated by the Police Department, the result of a 1971 class-action lawsuit that charged the city with abuses in surveillance during the 1960's. Now the standard for opening inquiries into political activity has been relaxed, full authority to begin surveillance has been restored to the police and federal courts no longer require a special panel to oversee the tactics.

Mr. Browne, the police spokesman, said the department did not increase its surveillance of political groups when the restrictions were eased. The powers obtained after Sept. 11 have been used exclusively "to investigate and thwart terrorists," Mr. Browne said. He would not answer specific questions about the disguised officers or describe any limits the department placed on surveillance at public events.

Jethro M. Eisenstein, one of the lawyers who brought the lawsuit 34 years ago, said: "This is a level-headed Police Department, led by a level-headed police commissioner. What in the world are they doing?"

For nearly four decades, civil liberty advocates and police officials have fought over the kinds of procedures needed to avoid excessive intrusion on people expressing their views, to provide accountability in secret police operations and to assure public safety for a city that has been the leading American target of terrorists.

To date, officials say no one has complained of personal damage from the information collected over recent months, but participants in the protests, rallies and other gatherings say the police have been a disruptive presence.

Ryan Kuonen, 32, who took part in a "ride of silence" in memory of a dead cyclist, said that two undercover officers - one with a camera - subverted the event. "They were just in your face," she said. "It made what was a really solemn event into something that seemed wrong. It made you feel like you were a criminal. It was grotesque."

Ms. Clancy, a founder of I-Witness Video, a project that collected hundreds of videotapes during the Republican National Convention that were used in the successful defense of people arrested that week, has assembled videotape of other public events made by legal observers, activists, bystanders and police officers.

She presented examples in October at a conference of defense lawyers. "What has to go on is an informed discussion of policing tactics at public demonstrations, and these images offer a window into the issues and allow the public to make up their own mind," Ms. Clancy said. "How is it possible for police to be accountable when they infiltrate events and dress in the garb of protesters?"

The videotapes that most clearly disclosed the presence of the disguised officers began in August 2004. What happened before that is unclear.

Among the events that have drawn surveillance is a monthly bicycle ride called Critical Mass. The Critical Mass rides, which have no acknowledged leadership, take place in many cities around the world on the last Friday of the month, with bicycle riders rolling through the streets to promote bicycle transportation. Relations between the riders and the police soured last year after thousands of cyclists flooded the streets on the Friday before the Republican National Convention. Officials say the rides cause havoc because the participants refuse to obtain a permit. The riders say they can use public streets without permission from the government.

In a tape made at the April 29 Critical Mass ride, a man in a football jersey is seen riding along West 19th Street with a group of bicycle riders to a police blockade at 10th Avenue. As the police begin to handcuff the bicyclists, the man in the jersey drops to one knee. He tells a uniformed officer, "I'm on the job." The officer in uniform calls to a colleague, "Louie - he's under." A second officer arrives and leads the man in the jersey - hands clasped behind his back - one block away, where the man gets back on his bicycle and rides off.

That videotape was made by a police officer and was recently turned over by prosecutors to Gideon Oliver, a lawyer representing bicycle riders arrested that night.

Another arrest that appeared to be a sham changed the dynamics of a demonstration. On Aug. 30, 2004, during the Republican National Convention, a man with vivid blond hair was filmed as he stood on 23rd Street, holding a sign at a march of homeless and poor people. A police lieutenant suddenly moved to arrest him. Onlookers protested, shouting, "Let him go." In response, police officers in helmets and with batons pushed against the crowd, and at least two other people were arrested.

The videotape shows the blond-haired man speaking calmly with the lieutenant. When the lieutenant unzipped the man's backpack, a two-way radio could be seen. Then the man was briskly escorted away, unlike others who were put on the ground, plastic restraints around their wrists. And while the blond-haired man kept his hands clasped behind his back, the tape shows that he was not handcuffed or restrained.

The same man was videotaped a day earlier, observing the actress Rosario Dawson as she and others were arrested on 35th Street and Eighth Avenue as they filmed "This Revolution," a movie that used actual street demonstrations as a backdrop. At one point, the blond-haired man seemed to try to rile bystanders.

After Ms. Dawson and another actress were placed into a police van, the blond-haired man can be seen peering in the window. According to Charles Maol, who was working on the film, the blond-haired man is the source of a voice that is heard calling: "Hey, that's my brother in there. What do you got my brother in there for?"

After Mr. Browne was sent photographs of the people involved in the convention incidents and the bicycle arrests, he said, "I am not commenting on descriptions of purported or imagined officers."

The federal courts have long held that undercover officers can monitor political activities for a "legitimate law enforcement purpose." While the police routinely conduct undercover operations in plainly criminal circumstances - the illegal sale of weapons, for example - surveillance at political events is laden with ambiguity. To retain cover in those settings, officers might take part in public dialogue, debate and demonstration, at the risk of influencing others to alter opinions or behavior.
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The authority of the police to conduct surveillance of First Amendment activities has been shaped over the years not only by the law but also by the politics of the moment and the perception of public safety needs.

In the 1971 class-action lawsuit, the city acknowledged that the Police Department had used infiltrators, undercover agents and fake news reporters to spy on yippies, civil rights advocates, antiwar activists, labor organizers and black power groups.

A former police chief said the department's intelligence files contained a million names of groups and individuals - more in just the New York files than were collected for the entire country in a now-discontinued program of domestic spying by the United States Army around the same time. In its legal filings, the city said any excesses were aberrational acts.

The case, known as Handschu for the lead plaintiff, was settled in 1985 when the city agreed to extraordinary new limits in the investigation of political organizations, among them the creation of an oversight panel that included a civilian appointed by the mayor. The police were required to have "specific information" that a crime was in the works before investigating such groups.

The Handschu settlement also limited the number of police officers who could take part in such investigations and restricted sharing information with other agencies.

Over the years, police officials made no secret of their belief that the city had surrendered too much power. Some community affairs officers were told they could not collect newspaper articles about political gatherings in their precincts, said John F. Timoney, a former first deputy commissioner who is now the chief of police in Miami.

The lawyers who brought the Handschu lawsuit say that such concerns were exaggerated to make limits on police behavior seem unreasonable. The city's concessions in the Handschu settlement, while similar to those enacted during that era in other states and by the federal government, surpassed the ordinary limits on police actions.

"It was to remedy what was a very egregious violation of people's First Amendment rights to free speech and assemble," said Jeremy Travis, the deputy police commissioner for legal affairs from 1990 to 1994.

At both the local and federal level, many of these reforms effectively discouraged many worthy investigations, Chief Timoney said. "The police departments screw up and we go to extremes to fix it," Chief Timoney said. "In going to extremes, we leave ourselves vulnerable."

Mr. Travis, who was on the Handschu oversight panel, said that intelligence officers understood they could collect information, provided they had good reason.

"A number of courts decided there should be some mechanism set up to make sure the police didn't overstep the boundary," said Mr. Travis, who is now the president of John Jay College of Criminal Justice. "It was complicated finding that boundary." The authority to determine the boundary would be handed back to the Police Department after the Sept. 11 attacks.

On Sept. 12, 2002, the deputy police commissioner for intelligence, David Cohen, wrote in an affidavit that the police should not be required to have a "specific indication" of a crime before investigating. "In the case of terrorism, to wait for an indication of crime before investigating is to wait far too long," he wrote.

Mr. Cohen also took strong exception to limits on police surveillance of public events.

In granting the city's request, Charles S. Haight, a federal judge in Manhattan, ruled that the dangers of terrorism were "perils sufficient to outweigh any First Amendment cost."

New guidelines say undercover agents may be used to investigate "information indicating the possibility of unlawful activity"- but also say that commanders should consider whether the tactics are "warranted in light of the seriousness of the crime."

Ms. Clancy said those guidelines offered no clear limits on intrusiveness at political or social events. Could police officers take part in pot-luck suppers of antiwar groups, buy drinks for activists? Could they offer political opinions for broadcast or publication while on duty but disguised as civilians?

Mr. Browne, the police spokesman, declined to answer those questions. Nor would he say how often - if ever - covert surveillance at public events has been approved by the deputy commissioner for intelligence, as the new guidelines require.


When I was young lad in primary school I had a voracious appetite for knowledge.One of my happiest days during that period of my life is when my dad bought two collections of encyclopedias; The Book of Knowledge and Encycopedia Americanna.
On some days when I was home from school and tired of raising hell and beating up my smaller brother and sister I would read those large volumes.My favourite entries were those concerning Greek mythology and the vast number of players in the pantheons' varied schemes.I will not even begin to go into my favourite stories and characters but there is one character whom I remember.....Achilles.
Achilles was the son of the mortal Peleus and the Nereid Thetis.For your information a nereid was one of the daughters of the sea god Nereus.Anyway moving on there were two versions about how Achilles gained his fabled invincibilty.In the earlier version, Thetis anointed the infant with ambrosia and then placed him upon a fire to burn away his mortal portions; she was interrupted by Peleus, whereupon she abandoned both father and son in a rage. Peleus placed the child in the care of the Centaur Chiron, who raised and educated the boy. In the later version, she held the young Achilles by the heel and dipped him in the river Styx; everything the sacred waters touched became invulnerable, but the heel remained dry and therefore unprotected.
If you have watched the movie Troy you will notice that the second version is the lynchpin of the story.Also of note is the fact that in the movie that his mother is the one whom is human or is potrayed as having a human body.But what other way is there to make a conceited,merciless and unstoppable warrior human but to give him a mother.With his mother he ceased to be death's right arm but became a man.Achilles was destined to fight in the war against Troy and this had been told to his mother by the seer Calchas.She knew if he fought in this war that he would be slain.So his mother sent him to be raised at the court of Lycomedes disguised as a girl.But even as a child the warrior begin him began to rise and he was fascinated with swords and shields.This fascination led to him being tutored by Phoenix, during which he formed a close relationship with Patroclus.
Back to the situation at hand and the crux of this post.When Achilles seeks his mother's advice or could be blessing before the war, Thetis tells him of the two paths that lay before him.He could choose to refuse to go to war, marry and raise a family.If he did so he would be comfortable but his name would only live as far as the lips of his grand children before being obscured by the mists of time or he could choose to go to war where indeed he would meet his end in battle but his in the act of slaying enemies in biblical propotions his name would never die and would live on the lips and in the minds of men and women for thousands of years to come.
As a boy who read the myth and a man who watched the movie both you and I know what path he chose.What I am coming to is that many of us are chosen for some form of greatness that may involve sacrifice.It may not be the ultimate sacrifice but it may be those things that everyday men and women strive for; jobs,money,marriage,family etc.What I wonder is that how many of us are willing to ignore these things and seek out the greatness universe may have ear marked us for?I must admit that the more time I spend in meditation the clearer these things become but like most human beings the weakness and the temptations of the flesh tend to dictate what path I follow and not the strength or clarity of the spirit within.One of my New Years resolutions is to spend at least 5 minutes a day in meditation.Many of us either wallk our lives looking at the ground or looking at the sky, I intend to live mine looking straight ahead........

Wednesday, December 21, 2005


mile·age also mil·age
1. Total length, extent, or distance measured or expressed in miles.
2. Total miles covered or traveled in a given time.
3. The amount of service, use, or wear estimated by miles used or traveled: This tire will give very good mileage.

I took a look at the last few posts that I have made and I noticed one thing.Kumeharibika!Right now I hardly have a schedule and I am sorely lacking when it comes to external stimuli.I looked at yesterday's post and I was like urghhhh!I have to admit it was far worse then Mutumia's all over the place post.
Anyway let's look at this mileage thigie.Oh this sound juicy!Quotes from a forum Kenyans out here like and some KBW comments.Then we'll see what mileage means.

Like someone just girls seem to have high mileage!

Its like you got repossed,auctioned to the highest bidder,used and now you headed straight for the junk!!!!!!

lets kill this thread.let the damu go and be shagged.she will be back although she will have high mileage

when we decide that we want to settle down and stop hanyaring we go get a nice chaste church gal with minimal mileage - Aco 2005!

But on the other hand, no-one wants to buy a shoe that everyone has been wearing for free,why buy the cow when everyone has been drinking the milk for free? -tosses another grenade sprinting away in glee- Aco 2005!

But aside from that, mileage is just a wrong way to look at things, arent those shoes self-healing or something - its not like there is 'tear and wear' involved in doing the deed - Ok, I may not have had any for a while, but I am still fighting.
Oh, does DIY count as tear and wear?
What if someone was gay and 'turned' straight, is there mileage countable?
What if you have had two lovers, but did it three times a day for the last five years, does that count as mileage?
I realise I an in a Questionable mental state, but damn, I cant seem to stop making up things :)
- Guess 2005!

@Guess: We wacha! DIY doesn't count!!! The odometer would break mami! I think it's all so arbitrary it's almost meaningless- I mean- what if I slep with Kamau then Otieno- then went back to Kamau- does that count as 2 or 3 men? What if I was in a three some with Kamau and Otish? Is that one man or two? What if I was in another state and used a fake name? eh? Does that count? - Mutumia 2005!

DIY is maintenance.Gay turning straight?Mileage is mileage whether the car was driven forward or in reverse.As for the effects of wear and tear there are some chics whom popular opinion/consensus has shown have been round the block so much that it 's like throwing a coin into a corridor when it come to the you know what.Hence the brisk sales of things like virginity soap.- Aco 2005!

This mileage biz has been discussed ad nauseum- Its weird though,this self-healing issue, seems to only apply to jamaaz. - Medusa 2005!

But then I get alarmed when a girl knows more than 6 men -in the biblical sense- within a 10 mile radius of her residence. It is in bad taste, it breaks the rules it is bordering on incest or something like that. Not that is is immoral or anything but it becomes logistically complicated when you meet at the checkout with all of them at the local supermarket.but I still wonder why virginity soap is such a hit kwanza the tunnel is not supposed to have chemicals introduced as you might end up with funny conditions....
the free shoe analogy, plus mileage self healing hihihi... people need prayers here.
- Prousette 2005!

@ Ms K
Also the diff permutations you and Guess have come up with are on a level of their own!One man/multiple encounters,2 men multiple encounters,3somes,aliases.What are ya'll going to come up with next?Orgies???
- Acolyte 2005!

This was one of the most interesting exchanges in KBW history.So according to me there are several conclusions.Mileage is counted in terms of partners and not encounters.One mile for a chic is equivalent to 0.25 miles for a guy, since we are hardier and are are not subject to the same stringent rules of examination.If you are a guy or a gal and when you go to your local supermarket or bar and meet more then 5 people you have slept with, you are a hoe!As a chic the more mileage you have, the less desirable you are as a marriage partner.Also gals are each others worst critics and a gal will not hesitate to reveal another gal's track record if it will help her win the guy the are fighting over.Oh much like used car salesmen no-one reveals the full extent of their mileage.Self service does not count as mileage it is more like maintenance.Please note that all orifices used to consumate the act count to total mileage,so some of you have much higher mileage then you think (substitution still counts).Last but not least Men self but women wear don't (sorry Guess).
Why do I have the feeling that I am not done with this post?

Tuesday, December 20, 2005


When I was back home it was a weekend ritual to watch an EPL game at my pal's place or at the pub depending on which clique I was hanging with.Very few sports have the artistry and beauty of soccer but that is the material for another day's post.
Today I want to talk about the games' platitudes.There are over 800 of them but I'll just gloss over a few that come to mind.
He's put it in Row Z!- What this means is that since Row Z is the last topmost tier of the stadium; that the player in question has cleared or shot the ball way off target and out of bounds.
"Welcome to the Premiership,fill in foreign player's name here."- Usually offered when a foreign player receives his first bone crunching tackle in a league game.
It's in the back of the net - When a goal has been scored.Where is the front of the net?
They defended like lions- To defend valiantly.Since when did lions defend?
He's hit the woodwork! - This refers to when a player hits the post.We all know that the posts are not made of wood but they once were hence the out dated term.
He almost cut him into two!- Used to refer to a bone crunching tackle.
It's a game of two halves - Aren't all soccer games.This is used to refer to the fact that things could change in the second half.
He'll be sick as a parrot!- Usually means that a player will be disappointed about the result or his performance in the game.
He's got blistering pace - Well other then that fact that it refers to a player who can run rather fast I dont know how blisters figure in.
We just didn't turn up first half and were lucky to go in one down - Refers to when a team plays so badly that they may have as well not been on the pitch.
The celebrations were short-lived - This refers to when the opposition equalises almost immediately.
He's lost the dressing-room - When a manager seems to be unable to command his players respect.
He's got safe hands - Refers to a reliable goalkeeper.What are unsafe hands?Dangerous?
They bowed out with their heads held high - Refers to a team that gave their best performace but lost.Is it anatomically possible to do that though?
One for the cameras - Refers to a very flashy goal.
They ground out a victory - When a team has to work hard to win a game.
The score doesn't reflect the true result - Then what does?This is used when a team feels that despite being the better side on the pitch tactically they lost.
They have one hand on the cup - This refers to a team that is minutes away from winning a cup final.
I'll try digs some up later.Next journalistic cliches!

Monday, December 19, 2005

Political Systems for Idiots

Politics has never been my thing even though my major is deeply mired in such matters.So someone sent me this guide to simplify the major systems for me.Enjoy!

FEUDALISM: You have two cows.Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government
takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone
else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows.The
government gives you a glass of milk.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: Your cows are cared for by
former chicken farmers. You have to take care of the
chickens the government took from the chicken
farmers.The government gives you as much milk and eggs
the regulations say you should need.

FASCISM: You have two cows.The government takes both,
hires you to take care of them, and sells you the

: You have two cows. The government
takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is

PURE COMMUNISM: You share two cows with your
neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has
the most "ability" and who has the most
"need".Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any
milk,and the cows drop dead of starvation.

: You have two cows. You have to take
care of them, but the government takes all the
milk.You steal back as much milk as you can and sell
it on the black market.

PERESTROIKA : You have two cows. You have to take care
of them, but the Mafia takes all the milk. You steal
back as much milk as you can and sell it on the "free"

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government
takes both and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes
both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors
decide who gets the milk.

BRITISH DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. You feed them
sheeps' brains and they go mad. The government doesn't
do anything.

AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give
you two cows if you vote for it. After the election,
the president is impeached for speculating in cow
futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate".

: You have two cows. The
government fines you for keeping two unlicensed farm
animals in an apartment.

neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

: You have two cows. One has actually
read the constitution, believes in it, and has some
really good ideas about government. The cow runs for
office, and while most people agree that the cow is
the best candidate, nobody except the other cow votes
for her because they think it would be "throwing their
vote away."

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the
government regulates what you can feed them and when
you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk
them.Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other
and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires
you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

CAPITALISM: You don't have any cows. The bank will not
lend you money to buy cows, because you don't have any
cows to put up as collateral.

: You have two cows.Either you sell the
milk fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows
and kill you.

You sell one and buy a bull - and build a herd of

: You have two cows. You sell
three of them to your publicly - listed company, using
letters of credit opened by your brother - in - law at
the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with
associated general offer so that you get all four cows
back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The
milk rights of six cows are transferred via a
Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company
secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells
the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed
company. The annual report says that the company owns
eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you
kill the two cows because the fung shiu is bad.

ENVIRONMENTALISM: You have two cows. The government
bans you from milking or killing them.

: You have two giraffes.The government
requires you to take harmonica lessons.

OLYMPICS-ISM: You have two cows, one American, one
Chinese. With the help of trilling violins and state
of the art montage photography, John Tesh narrates the
moving tale of how the American cow overcame the agony
of growing up in a suburb with (gasp) divorced
parents, then mentions in passing that the Chinese cow
was beaten every day by a tyrannical farmer and
watched its parents butchered before its eyes. The
American cow wins the competition, severely spraining
an udder in a gritty performance, and gets a
multi-million dollar contract to endorse Wheaties. The
Chinese cow is led out of the arena and shot by
Chinese government officials, though no one ever hears
about it. McDonald's buys the meat and serves it hot
and fast at its Beijing restaurant.

FEMINISM: You have two cows. They get married,neuter all the bulls
and adopt a veal calf.

COUNTER CULTURE-ISM: Wow, dude, there's like... these
two cows, man. You got to have some of this milk.

: You have two cows. You sell three of them to
your publicly listed company, using letters of credit
opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then
execute a debt/equity swap with the associated general
offer so you get all four cows back, with a tax
exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six
cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman
Island company secretly owned by the majority
shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows
back to your listed company. The annual report states
that the company owns eight cows, with an option on
one more.

AMERICAN CORPORATIONISM: You have two cows. You sell
one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the
2nd one. You force the two cows to produce the milk of
four cows using Bioengineered hormones. You lobby an
ignorant Congress so as to make sure that you do not
have to label your milk products - even if they cross
state lines. You are surprised when one cow drops
dead, but you work out a deal so that you can sell it
to a renderer - and feed it back to your herd. Some of
the older second-cycle cows cannot be impregnated -
while others deliver twins - that have to killed and
sold for pitance as vealers... You spin an
announcement to the analysts stating you have
downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes

FRENCH CORPORATIONISM: You have two cows. You go on
strike because you want three cows. You go to lunch.
Life is good.

redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an
ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. They
learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains. Most
are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATIONISM: You have two cows. You engineer
them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give
excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an
hour. Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of
vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATIONISM: You have two cows but you
don't know where they are. While ambling around, you
see a beautiful woman. You break for lunch. Life is

RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them
and learn you have five cows. You have somemore vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You
count themagain and learn you have 12 cows. You stop
counting cows and open another bottle ofvodka. You
produce your 10th 5-year plan in the last 3 months.
The Mafia shows upand takes over however many cows you
really have.

FLORIDA CORPORATIONISM: You have a black cow and a
brown cow. Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who like the brown one best, vote
for the black one. Some people vote for both. Some
people vote for neither. Some people can't figure out
how to vote at all. Finally, a bunch of guys from
out-of-state tell you which is the best-looking one.

NEW YORK CORPORATIONISM: You have fifteen million
cows. You have to choose which one will be the leader
of the herd, so you pick some fat cow from Arkansas.

: Holy Cow! I'm the duly elected president of a
nation of sheep who believe anything that the
benighted news tells them, such as that my brother was
a well-experienced politician - somehow elected to the
Governorship of Florida, where due to some specially
original voting technology, we cowed the even more
specially qualified Vice-President by beating him at
creating new means for originating out-of-state
voters, with special ties to the war machine - that I
am particularly fond of milking, and then turning
around and selling them both new parts, new
technologies, and fuel to operate them with, while
creating not only new jobs, but new historical sound
bites as I offend those who worship sacred cows, and
feed others my most important product - really prime

Other Definitions needing attention:

DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people
into office that put a tax on your cows, forcing you
to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The people
you voted for then take the tax money, buy a cow and
give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous. Barbara
Streisand sings for you.

: You have two cows. The government takes one
and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative
to tell him how to manage his cow.

REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none.

COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes
both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for
hours to get it. By this time, it is expensive and

: You have two cows.
The government taxes you to the point you have to sell
both to support a man in a foreign country who has
only one cow, which was a gift from your government.

: You have two cows. The
government takes them both, shoots one, milks the
other, pays you for the milk, and then pours the milk
down the drain.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Put up or shut up!

ac·tiv·ism:The use of direct, often confrontational action, such as a demonstration or strike, in opposition to or support of a cause.
I am sick and tired of people calling themselves activists of any cause and doing next to nothing.Most of theirs so called activism is in terms of flapping their gums,token actions such as buying a red/pink ribbon once a year,setting up a blog/website/forum, attending public talks and seminars in prominent hotels where they rub shoulders with other glory hounds.
True activists are people like the Maasai lady who treks hundreds of miles fighting FGM.Those who in Rwanda and Burundi who went against their tribes and helped the besieged.People like Pro Wangari Maathai who put herself on the line for the environment for no reward for a long long time.The local neighbourhood priest who instead of acting like his vacuous counterparts on television offering viewers divine health and wealth in exchange for "love gifts" (bribes) but insteads works within his community offering advice,his time and prayer knowing that he can't promise miracles but he can promise his time and faith.
I could go on and on but I am sure that you all know such examples of people who either practice what they preach or dont even preach and let their actions do all the talking.So when you run around saying that you are an ______ist of any sort are you that in name only?So I know some of you are telling me not to judge coz I too may be judged.Well I am not judging but the Bible says that you shall know them by their fruit so here I am, your friendly neighbourhood fruit inspector.......
The Instigator