Friday, June 01, 2007

Masochism, Messages And Other Things

Time and again I have spoken about womens' appetite for suffering and in true Aco fashion I can't resist the chance to share a story. There is this Kenyan chic I met sometime when I got here, a very nice chic but she always looks a bit tired. It is when I got to talk to my close pal who is her bosom buddy that I got to know why she looks a bit worn most of the time and drinks like a fish during Kenyan functions/bashes. You see this girl has been dating a dude for 5 years and this dude treats her like crap. I was once at their house and I recall him talking to her like a 5 year old at different occasions with some flippant remarks thrown in. I was told that things get worse, there was one day when she came home from work to find him seated with another Kenyan chic on the couch looking very cozy. She asked what the girl was doing there and demanded that she leave, this new girl in turn got up and began hurling at her the same kind of insults her boyfriend used to; meaning that the boyfriend had been sharing the dirt. On a side note this new chic had been in the country for less than 3 months, talk about coming in with a bang. The case ended when she called the cops and the chic was asked to leave since she wasn't on any lease or documentation showing she had the right to be in the house.
Anyway several months back this dude was laid off from his job and since he is picky has not yet gotten a new job. In the meanwhile for all these months and even earlier this chic has been working two jobs to pay the mortgage. To make things worse, this dude has American citizenship and despite being together for all those years he told the chic that he wouldn't file for her to get residency. So this means that she is stuck doing entry level jobs where they don't check on your immigration status. I do understand that he may not be in a rush to get married but I do think he can file a prenup and do it for her seeing that they have been together for 5 years plus. But despite all this drama, she is still with him. Why she is putting up with all that? I don't know, I'll watch from the sidelines and keep you all updated.

Message of the day from this video. Don't smoke weed before your interviews! But I don't think it would have made a difference in T-pain's case this dude is waaaaaaaaaaaay off the edge.

In other news, I had a disturbing flashback. Do you all remember a show called Life Goes On? Remember one of the main characters Corky Thatcher, the boy who had Down's syndrome? Well since everyone used to watch the show in my school, people were familiar with his clumsiness and lower than average IQ that came from having Down's syndrome. Anyway whenever someone would do something stupid or clumsy they would be baptised "Corky" by the rest of the class till the class forgot or someone else did something just as clumsy or stupid. And people say kids are innocent.

Oh well, have a nice weekend everybody!

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Music, Music And Other Things

There is this dude or I would like to think he is one and not a woman with a deep voice who lives in a block of houses that is separated from the complex that I live in by a fence. But even so I can still here the music that he plays. This dude has some of the best soul I have ever heard, the kind of songs that were always in the back of your head but come screaming back to the present when you hear them. Anyway today when I was coming from a long day at the grindstone when I was met by the sounds of classic 80s soul drifting towards the door and to make things worse it was accompanied by the tempting aroma of a meat roasting. If it wasn't for the fact that you don't know who owns guns to protect their houses I may have jumped over the fence, introduced myself and joined the party. Makes me realise how much I miss home where nyama choma used to abound, unlike meat here which is packed full of steroids and drained of all flavour by the time it gets to you.

I was just going through some of the music that I "collect" online and I came across this jewel. For those of you who read my last post and M's last offering, you know how we feel about alot of contemporary music. Anyway can you tell me what rap song that tune was sampled in and better yet can you tell me where the tune was originally featured! Let's get to know the real I love the 80s/90s peeps in the house!

I also listened to a classic rap song recently and when I watched the video, tears began to roll down my face, when I began to think of what we have to listen to, I began to bawl like a baby. Anyway that is why CD sales have gone down 20% but anyway like the an apocalyptic prophet I will get lost in my own dream world before I come back screaming, "the end is nigh!"

Onto non musical matters, while trolling this site seeing if some lass had decided to defame me (sadly when they can't have me they want to destroy me), I came up with this theory. A man's skill in the bedroom and physical endowment is directly proportional to how good he is as a boyfriend. When a man is the lover dreams are made of his skill and endowment in the bedroom rise to epic proportions but when he falls out of favour he instantly becomes a one minute, two inch man. Lesson learned, in relationships reality is nothing but perception is everything.

Is this how little we value our children? How can this group of women get only 2 years in jail for kidnapping a child? Try kidnapping a child here or in a European country and you will spend the better part of 20 years behind bars if not longer. Plus the Ugandan lady who claimed to have been pregnant for 16 months added some gloss to my day, what was she carrying in her womb? A baby elephant?

Monday, May 28, 2007

In My Day.......................

I was thinking back about some of the posts I have written and I think that some of my readers must think I'm some sort of curmudgeon of sorts. You know the kind of geezer who sits on his porch, shakes his stick at the young lads and every statement he makes begins with; " In my day........"

This is because most of the following themes that reoccur in my posts on a regular basis while.

1. Contemporary Music Is Crap - I have expressed this sentiment so many times that most people must think that I sit at home listening to my Sanyo casette player listening to music that was released before Kenyans even knew what a cd player was while high speed dubbing a tape for the cute girl next door.

2. Relationships Of This Generation Are Crap - Don't get me wrong our parents generation didn't have a walk in the park but the reason many of them are hitting the 20 year mark and longer is that they knew it wasn't easy and even if they didn't society made them stick together so they made it work. While on the other hand look at us? At the first sign of trouble, people get with the stepping; divorce papers and all. When my folks hooked up, my mum used to walk to town on most days to work since they weren't doing all that well while my dad went to law school as they lived in their one room digs, needless to say with her support he eventually came to the good. Those stories are few and far in between nowadays everyone wants to hook up with the complete article be it male or female, no time to wait for potential. What about courting? People just don't take the time to woo and be wooed anymore, gone are the days of yore when letters were exchanged alongside eagerly awaited moments spent together; try that nowadays and the person you are wooing will have someone on the side as they wait for you that is if they don't lose interest first.

3. People Can't Parent To Save Their Lives - Once again I will issue my disclaimer, parenthood isn't a walk in the park but even so, it is no excuse for the mess parents of our generation have created. I look at the way children act nowadays and I want to find their mothers and fathers and slap them silly. Nowadays too many parents are trying to be their kids' friends instead of parents, remember the good old days when we all had a healthy fear of our parents? Nowadays most kids don't respect let alone fear their parents. It's all this new age touchy feely stuff I tell you!

4. They Just Don't Make Friends Like They Used To - Many of the people of my parent's generation have pal's whom they go back 10 - 20 years back with. I have two and I know some people have more but it is so hard to make good reliable friends nowadays. I guess it has something do with the age of individualism we are living in.

5. People Just Don't Have The Values They Used To - Does anyone remember how a long time back you could leave the doors to your house open during the day? How you could let your kids / small brothers and sisters play with any of the kids outside without getting scared of something happening? How if you lost something if someone found it they would actually try and find you? Well that was then and this is now. You can't just trust anyone nowadays!

6. They Just Don't Make Stuff Like They Used To - When Supa Orange Snack disappeared off the shelves I knew we were in trouble. Yes I'm talking about junk food. When the Cadbury's factory in Kenya was closed or productions scaled down ( I know it was one of the two), they began importing our regular brands from Egypt and I cried myself to sleep after I took a bite of

7. When Did We Let Such Things Seem Ordinary - This one is related to point number 5 as it is about values. But remember when people had "morals" please note the brackets because I know people still used to do nasty stuff way back when but at least they used to keep it under wraps. Read M's latest post about how people air their dirty linen in public and you will know what I'm talking about. Also I did find it shocking that before I left Kenya the fact that so many of the night spots used to have hos in them, I remember a time to hook up with a ho; you either went to some dingy pubs or F1/F2. But now go to Choices, Pavements, Carnivore and wherever else you'll find them. The fact that there all over means that people don't mind picking them up in the open irregardless what people think. Or if you don't get out at night, have you seen how people dress nowadays? I remember way back when wearing a mini anywhere outside an evening function or the privacy of your own home was blasphemous but in Kenya I used to see so many girls dressing like they are on the way to the club, and this was 8 am. Don't get me wrong guys are far from perfect, nowadays too many young dudes wear rap couture (jeans big enough to house a family of midgets) instead of trying to cultivate their own personal style.
Frankly I have no problem with freedom and all the good that it brings but I do think that at times we take it waaaaaaaaaaay too far!

8. Money Doesn't Go As Far As It Used To - Kenyan money is hardly worth the money it is printed on anymore. Remember the days when 100/= was alot of money? The days when fries cost 5/= a pack? Despite all the advances Kenya has made economically, the Kenyan shilling just isn't as strong as it used to be in terms of inflation. Yes I know some Narcolyte will come out of the woodwork yodelling about how the goverment has made the economy grow by 5% every year and such but it still doesn't explain why more and more everyday items are out of reach for ordinary Kenyans. Anyway that's my opinion, I'm not going to budge or discuss economics.

Anyway I feel I've said enough. I'll be honest and say that there are alot of good things that have happened over the past few years ie internet access, political freedom, increased capitalist influence in Kenyan business. But for every one thing we gain we seem to lose another. So I'm not grouchy about what we've gained but I'm grouchy about what we've lost and are losing. Let's appreciate the good times while they last, I'm off to nap now..........