Friday, July 16, 2004

Still at work!

It's 9 pm and I am still in the office.After being chewed out for doing work I was not meant to be doing badly I am now back to html work but low level testing designed pages.Ooooh exciting.Need to edit or something.
Anyway at least they bought us diner I had a large chicken pizza.Took only 3 slices will save the rest for home.I have realised that my psyke for meat is slowly waning I will be vegetarian in no time.Otherwise i hope i am not needed in the office tommorrow.I want to buy a starter Tarot book.The big guy is here reviewing progress I am not even listening to them as I really don't exist in the big scheme of things unless I assert my presence.Oh life we never get a brake.
I hope I am not too tired to lucid dream tonight I need a brake.I think I will start receeding into a shell all this drama is getting to me. 

Fuck This!

Seems I screwed up yesterday.I was given someones work to add some features to.Seems he had not done the content as it was meant to be so I catch flack from the chic on top of me.
I was really pissed at first but I just put on my headphones and listened to music, did work I am supposed to and of course blogged for the week.
Fuck it today work ends for me at 2 pm.Due to where out offices are I can't bounce so I'll just kick back,blog and listen to sounds.I think I will write my letter to have editorial responsibilities added coz what I am doing now ain't helping me personally or proffesionally.
At least I will have time to meditate and relax this weekend.

A lot of uneccesary work!

What I do with myself from 9 - 5 is web design. Anyway our overall supervisor is a total dumbass who knows jack about graphic or web design. So the designers here turn ideas into concepts ( pictures ) and I turn those into web pages.
anyway the main big guy takes forver to make up his mind and perfect work is always being tweaked and redone.Add a supervisor who also makes stupid additions and these designers work forever so I have quite a bit of free time.
Anyway I dunno how but the super convinces the main guy that he should see the whole site done.Even though a few templates as usual would work comes up.To make it worse he wants them done as pics so all that work has to be done in photoshopand fireworks.These are graphics applications that can be crashed by too much text.So I am called in too irregardless of the fact I am not a graphic designer to do alot of work I know nothing about.I have gotten home at 11.30 pm the last 2 days.

Interesting Dreams

I had an interesting dream on Monday night.( This is the Readers Digest version folks ) I dreamt that I was hanging out with some ppl sharing words of wisdom and stuff.Anyway the drream went on a little and it turns out I was sleeping so I woke up.Ordinary huh?Guess again I woke up in the dream world.I mean have you ever heard about dreaming about dreaming?I have not gotten time to do any indepth meditation with my new crystals but I will tap in as soon as I do. 

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Sleeping can be tiring

Yesterday I was checking out this site on stuff like astral travel and lucid dreams.Anyway I used to have lucid dreams which is basically being aware/awake in your dream and being able to do stuff as oppossed to the usual kind of dream where you are a spectator.
So I do some light meditation before bed-time something I am trying to make a daily habit if I am to make any progress whatsoever.So I can only focus for 10 mins now,that may seem brief but when you slow down your mind 10 mins feels like 50 mins.
Anyhow I have this really interesting dream amd the most interesting thing is that it's a dream.Meaning I wake up and I find that I'm dreaming!Crazy huh?guess I'll see waht happens tonight.
the only thing is that I'm feeling kind of run down and it's just morning.I'm also trying to watch Carlito's Way, an Al Pacino classic.due to my poor attention span I'm going to watch it in like 4 parts.Well let's see what goes down later.

another week begins

tried to post yesterday but something went wrong so my post couldn't go up,damn!It was a pretty long one too.Anyway had a laid back weekend wanted to see Spiderman 2 but aiiii the price they were charging was way too much, will simply wait for it to drop.
Otherwise checked out some really good tarot book, may buy it if the imbecile I so a site for coughs up what he owes me.
Anyway went for a play this Sunday, a gal pal gave me a ticket.My first play in almost 10 years.Well it was nothing to write home about.In fact Ileft after the interval.I guess the only theatre I really like are musicals.
the hiring and firing guy should be coming in on Thursday so I can give him my proposal coz this bumming biz is getting real old real fast.

Monday, July 12, 2004

another week

Another week begins.Had an interesting let's call it exchange with a pal who gives me a ride home after the church meetings I usually go this friday we were covering outreach and such.Have you ever had one of those moments of clarity, you know where everything seems to move in slow motion but you're still in real-time and some revaltaion comes to you.Well it is at that point that I realised that I felt nothin whatsoever for this out-reach issue.
I realised that Church is not the thing for me given the revalations that have come to me.I noted that I now have a much wider reaching holistic view of god.I believe that the best analogy is that god is like a chameleon whom men saw at diffrent times of the day so one saw it as red,another orange and another I no longer believe in one main religion,what I believe is that there is a right religion for everyone.As a result I am also tapering down my church attendance,I realised that church was not doing much for me socially or spiritually.A
Anyway so i tell her about my new view and plans as she is giving me a ride home.I told her that she would see me in around 3 months time.Needless to say she was not too amused and held the usual christian views,one god,Jesus blah blah blah....
She said that the conversation was not over but I doubt we'll continue.I'll still hang around with christians socially but this is a walk I have put off way too long.I must complete it no matter what the cost.I do not want to live a life with any regrets.I have procrastinated too many things in my life, this is not another one.