Tuesday, December 20, 2005


When I was back home it was a weekend ritual to watch an EPL game at my pal's place or at the pub depending on which clique I was hanging with.Very few sports have the artistry and beauty of soccer but that is the material for another day's post.
Today I want to talk about the games' platitudes.There are over 800 of them but I'll just gloss over a few that come to mind.
He's put it in Row Z!- What this means is that since Row Z is the last topmost tier of the stadium; that the player in question has cleared or shot the ball way off target and out of bounds.
"Welcome to the Premiership,fill in foreign player's name here."- Usually offered when a foreign player receives his first bone crunching tackle in a league game.
It's in the back of the net - When a goal has been scored.Where is the front of the net?
They defended like lions- To defend valiantly.Since when did lions defend?
He's hit the woodwork! - This refers to when a player hits the post.We all know that the posts are not made of wood but they once were hence the out dated term.
He almost cut him into two!- Used to refer to a bone crunching tackle.
It's a game of two halves - Aren't all soccer games.This is used to refer to the fact that things could change in the second half.
He'll be sick as a parrot!- Usually means that a player will be disappointed about the result or his performance in the game.
He's got blistering pace - Well other then that fact that it refers to a player who can run rather fast I dont know how blisters figure in.
We just didn't turn up first half and were lucky to go in one down - Refers to when a team plays so badly that they may have as well not been on the pitch.
The celebrations were short-lived - This refers to when the opposition equalises almost immediately.
He's lost the dressing-room - When a manager seems to be unable to command his players respect.
He's got safe hands - Refers to a reliable goalkeeper.What are unsafe hands?Dangerous?
They bowed out with their heads held high - Refers to a team that gave their best performace but lost.Is it anatomically possible to do that though?
One for the cameras - Refers to a very flashy goal.
They ground out a victory - When a team has to work hard to win a game.
The score doesn't reflect the true result - Then what does?This is used when a team feels that despite being the better side on the pitch tactically they lost.
They have one hand on the cup - This refers to a team that is minutes away from winning a cup final.
I'll try digs some up later.Next journalistic cliches!


Gary Freedman said...

Rock on!

Acolyte said...

Msanii,Nick?!Where are ya'll?You have been usurped?

Msanii_XL said...

aco..damn and the way i was on Blogwatch..closely monitoring..
anyway freedman does not count...
and you can't be in sweepstake neither..so i hereby declare myself winner

Msanii_XL said...

how about some swa cliches(ok not exactly cliches but)..

"amefungulia Kiatu used to be my fav"....

Mpira ulikuwa mwingi..

Ameudaka mpira..

memories.. no year was great than 82-83..EA&C championships. there need to be an audio archive for such superb commmentary..

Nakeel said...

Aco Merry Xmass and Happy new year...

Acolyte said...

@ Msanii
I dunno but I think KBC should be having that stuff in their acrchives.
@ Nakeel
Thank you and you have a merry x-mas too!