Saturday, April 08, 2006

Rated M for Man-time!

This post is for the guys out there.It's time for The Acolyte to share some advice with the brothers.So ladies thanks for coming by please detour through here.Thank you!
Anyway to the few KBW men out there.It has come to my notice that there is a small carnal drought going on.I on the other hand have set myself aside from the mating game for spiritual reasons but I know that is not the case for most of you except maybe Joe (I can mention your name here right?)
Anyway I have noticed that when many men want to get some, they go to clubs.I mean it sounds good in theory; many women, fewer men (not all the time though), gals in skimpy clothes, alcohol, enclosed spaces.Looks great doesn't it!All those gals to choose from so you have a chance of getting some right?Well I am going to tell you one thing, looking to get laid in clubs is a waste of your time and money.Go to clubs to hang with the boys, listen to music and drink; and leave it at that.The minute you go their with the sole aim of getting laid you are already 1,000 man points down and going to waste valuable man-hours and maney!Let me school you boys about why it's a losing proposition.
1.The Girl Game! - This is a game that girls love to play esp in the club.Once you agree to play, you have been owned!First things first most guys go to the club to get laid while girls go the club with their gals to dance,hang out and play the girl game.This starts by a girl going to a club (looking hot) with her girls.Women love clubs because they hold all the cards their, it's their turf and not yours.Anyway back to the game

-Gal sees a guy checking her out :1 point
-Gal sees a cute guy checking her out: 2 points
-Gal sees a guy she was checking out looking at her: 3 points
-The cute guy asks her to dance: 4 points
-Gal confirms that the guy wants her because he is touching her: 5 points
-Gal sees her gal's boyfriend checking her out: 5 points
-Gal is offered drinks by guys: 4 points

The more points a gal can get in one night the better she feels, she doesn't have to give anything up as there are many suckers in the club willing to stroke her ego for nothing!The problem is that the more points she scores, the harder it gets for you to hook up!So after you get into the game she has like 17 points over you and will pass you over for a harder challenge.So to stand any chance in the club you have to refuse to play the game.But this won't do you much good because of point number 2.
2.Competition! - Who likes compe?I don't!Do you?You can beat the competition if your game is good enough but who wants to have to do that if you don't have to.
By the time you get to the club, the gal has been approached by so many guys that her points are through the roof.So this makes things harder for you even if she likes you.
She has spent hours getting dressed and is feeling all that.So she thinks she is all that and this puts and extra burden on you to impress her.Who needs that extra work?
She is probably with her gals at the club playing the girl game.She may have gone home with you if she was alone but as long as she is with the gal that isn't happening as she doesn't want her gals to judge her.So if you are lucky for all your work you may get her number.
The Mother Hen.This is that irritating gal who will not leave you alone with the gal for 5 minutes.She will always be there pulling her away to dance,take her to the loos,make laps of honor and when you try to tell gal that you will take her home, you will here the dreaded line; "We came together so we are leaving together!".
The club is filled with other people who can kill your game.Many of them have game and some don't.But all of them are a distraction and some gals think they can have them all.
3. Perceptions - Girls have an instinctive distrust of guys they meet in the club.Their mothers and gal pals have warned them that men in the club are only after one thing.So now the burden on you is to prove that you are not one of those guys (even if you are!).Every girl has had that one night stand from the club that never called back.
4.Environment - Clubs are noisy,cramped and chaotic.It's hard to get a good flow going in one.It's hard for you to display your best qualities here, you're just like every other guy fishing in a pool of mud.
Fact is that girls are alot easier to get with when you meet them somewhere else other then clubs.Away from a club a gal's guard is down and even very "hot" girls will give you a whole lot more time then they would in a club.Girl's also tend to dress more casually when they aren't in clubs so the fact that you are talking to them makes them think that their looks are not the first thing on your mind.Open up your minds men!There are loads of women elsewhere and most of the fruitful pursuits I have had did not start in the club.So take this to heart and get busy!
Thanks to Kenyangal I too have began reading books which are "The Rules" version for men!Have a man-tastic weekend!


Kenyangal said...

Ati M for Mantime! hahaha I swear you're killing me!! I have to go to work now but will be back here bright and early (and armed to the teeth)

acolyte said...

I'll be here!Have a productive evening!

kelitu said...

Acolyte, i dont mind being stepped to in a club. Just leave your lame game at home i.e getting smashed 1st while sororaing me & then getting the guts to come ask me a lame-ass qstn (e.g do you have a big sis? or have i seen you before?) WTH?!

I admit, i am not man-friendly esp in the club scene. 1st impressions count, so if you look like your not sure of yourself when you karibia me, i will definately blow you off (it's not you, it's just business).

Joseph Walking said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Joseph Walking said...

Lol interesting post aco but its not applicable for me 'don’t club’. Honestly, I know I can get any woman I want. Not bragging it is just a fact.
Kelitu though I think summed it up about guys getting smashed and not being sure of themselves. However, I also have to point out one thing I have noticed Kenyan women, Kenyan women think any conversation with a Kenyan guy= he is hitting on me. That is just pityful. Especially because many of our sisters assume that all guys do not have standards and as long as I can wear a skirt I am game for him. Conversation does not =I want you. Its just conversation
wearing a skirt/tight jeans does not =I want you and am trying to hit on you. Not all brothers are starved and willing to settle for what they can get.
Not all brothers just want to hit it. I would be lying if I said sex doesn’t come up somewhere in the thought processes even for women despite all the fronting but some of us renaissance men we have other requirements intellectual stimulation for me is a requirement not an option,where you at spiritually . So before you run and make assumptions go with the flow relax get to know what am about

Joseph Walking said...

and i forgot ! when i start hitting on you dont worry you will know coz you will be drawing maps with your feet and gigggling like a school gal( yes you a whole grown woman lol)

Stunuh Jay said...

Detour through here! Mkora numero uno! Haidhuru. You forgot to mention:
1) Before a man even has a clue a chick has decided whether he'll get some or not. In most cases he opens he's mouth and gets...NONE

That being said, you're absolutely right, we had a rule in college(that I stress 100%) If you met it at the club, leave it at the club. Some performances are not enhanced by the presence of alcohol, so do pick the girl up anywhere esle, you might get to the end of play...and even score ;)

Milonare said...


Much as I would agree with you on this like 60%, I would also say that you are more likely to get some from a girl in the club than one you meet at say a library...

Alcohol, slow winding and grinding on the floor and a general party euphoria has been known to break down a lot of female walls and inhibitions. So long as you read her right and flow with her...


That being said, however, I shall calmly return to my seat on the bilas train - no complaints LOLOL

I think any woman is a bit of a stretch. Give a brother a heads up when you've gotten with Beyonce. LOLOLOL

Farmgal said...

@Joe mmmmhhhh any woman?

Joseph Walking said...

ddddd did i starter! lol -any woman i want . not just any millionare beyounce is out coz she is fly but i dont want her Howz that for an answer!-remember i said physical flyness doesnt mean i want you.Even beyounce doesnt get a free pass.(if you have lived in the states you know everyday we see flyer women than beyounce on a daily basis)But honestly i still stick to what i said call it confidence call it what you want but i know what am bringing to the table so the issue is what are you bringing to the table.Good,God fearing focused guys are far and few.

ps let me clarify another thing since i see this post is drifting to hitting .my wanting is not refering to hitting i mean hooking up

Kenyangal said...

Well that detour got me sidetracked for a minute but you can't keep away a determined woman!!LOL anyway, I won't comment because I don't want to give directions to men that are looking for the quickest route to "hitting it" and men that are looking for something serious already know not to look in a club. But maybe a serious man might go to a club for strictly a man night and same for a woman,strictly girl night and they meet and fall in love! Serendipity

Prousette said...

I agree with stunuh on the girl having the upper hand always. The smart ones will never let that fact on.

Some of us go clubbing to dance and have a good time in that order. Cannot imagine why I someone who can barely see me would want to hit on me unless that is their version of a having a good time.

c.a said...'re so right. i would be one of those girls who goes to the club with my girlfriends and have a great time, while "rescuing" each other from those men we deem "desperately in need of a one-night stand". on the other hand, there are a very few minority of girls that also go to the club to hook up with guys, although the ones I know personally are not kenyan. all in all, it's amazing what a little alcohol will do...

acolyte said...

@ kelitu
Seems you're more accomodating then other gals who are anti club vibe kabisa!
@ joe
I see you have high standards and an ego to go with it!Ebu jitetea!
@ stunuh
Yup when it comes to the hook up the cards are all in the mamas hands and this post aims to take them away!
@ Milo
I disagree kabisa alcohol may help but it does not work 100% while you can pata from the chics of elsewhere on a higher percentage via the rules in this would be surprised how much you can gather in the streets with the right technique!
@ kenyangal
Wacha uchoyo!Ebu share your info we compare!For once I need your help!
@ prou
Thank you for helping me with the mindset of an everyday chic!
@ c.a
So you're a mother hen?They have their uses!But dont spoil for the fisis out there!

Milonare said...

Alkie is not 100% thats why i was saying it has been known rather than it always breaks down the female inhibitions...

I do not disagree that it is possible to get some off the street (not K of cos)...

I just think it is more probable with Alkie LOL

acolyte said...

@ Milo
I am not a fan of chemical warfare coz sometimes the results may not be what you expect!Plus daytime warfare is cheaper and in some cases faster!

Anonymous said...

Aco...i read you post and some once in a while but on this one me choose to disagree. And this if from experience. The club gives you the fastes way to some some ass withing 24 hours without a doubt. The question is who are you targetting. if you want to tap some fatser faster diabz... the under 21 or even under 25 cluns woun't saidia you. mama in that age bracket a usually feeling maua and a into the whole paka an panya game. Go to an over 25 club, generally mama sin that age group no what they want and in most cases don't fuatana like a pack of wolves. you'll usually no how "tapable" a mama is within 30 max.
I am currently 30 yrs old and before i turned 27 i used to katia older mamas especially when looking for a causual relationship as opposed to serious one.
Mamas usually feel maua san in theri late teens and early twenties...then if the are not married by 29 they start having issues. even the most "independent" ones. By 30 they are looking for serious relationships. The flip side is that jamawho could marry them are mostly eoither married or players. So while they wait for Mr right to come along. You can tap them rahis rahisi.
I had some pals in cole in diggz. This guys were shags modos but my guy, this jamas of shags jua how to pata pushizi bila going through the whole dating game. as any ama who went to campo in kenya ...especially kenyata uni.
My point here is the club may not be the mosy ideal place to meet you future mate but it is the place to meet mamas you can shag within 24 hours

acolyte said...

@ Anon
One thing I will agree is that there are some men who are gurus when it comes to getting some in the clubs but that is a minority.But please note that bars are separate from clubs for me as in my own experience bars can also be more welcoming the clubs.But it is true that looks dont count for too much when you are talking about game.
I do feel you that once mamas are over 25 it gets easier to get game from them as they have realised that they are not getting any younger and that the good men are running out in number!