Thursday, June 22, 2006

Part I - Are Fathers really neccesary?

I was thinking on doing a super post on the whole fatherhood issue but instead I will do a serial interactive post instead.

Father's Day comes and goes without the same warmth and celebration as Mother's Day. The phone companies do not strain nearly as much with the prerequisite calls. The florists? Forget it. As for gifts in general, it's not the hottest holiday for retailers. Eight out of 10 people wait until the week before Father's Day to buy dad a gift, according to the Mass Retail Association. What's the most popular gift for Dad? The survey shows that 42 percent of shoppers buy their father...a card.

Fact is that fathers are no big deal.More often then not the now accepted definition of family in many societies is a mother and her children.Single parenthood no longer carries the stigma it used to.A single woman can adopt and go to sperm bank and get pregnant and no one will bat an eye lid.Even back home in Kenya there are many single mothers by choice.Many of the women who are touted as icons for women are single mothers who have it all career, social glory and glowing children.A father is deemed uneccesary in this equation.The thing is nowadays you are likely to hear a woman say that she wants a child and a father does not figure in this equation at all other then as a sperm donor and future child support check writer.
Fact is that nowadays one income can bring up a child or two, in fact if you are in a first world country there is always the child support check to bolster the mothers earnings; so you have the cash without having to deal with the father.There is always daycare or in the case of Kenya, domestic help to care for the child when the mother is not home.
The disdain for fathers has extended to the mass media where more often then not fathers are potrayed in the 3 Ds (dumb, disaffected, dangerous). Commercials abound with fathers who cannot help their children do their homework, who use leaf blowers to clean the sitting room as they are too incompotent to learn how to use a vacuum cleaner and who create a collosal mess trying to cook a routine meal until microwave.I don't even want to get started about sitcomes and dramas which in the case of minorities last had Cosby as a good father figure while potrayals of weak and incompotent father figures in sitcoms and programs like Yes dear,Everyone loves Raymond, Simpsons, American Dad are the norm.Yes, that is the state of fatherhood in the Western mass media.
The fact is that women can do it all (so it seems), according to today's women there are no good men and women don't seem to need them anyway; as a result I ask myself and you out there, "Are fathers neccesary?" furthermore as Maureen Dowd asked "Are men neccesary?".

Part II - When there is no father....

PS:Ooooooooooh yeah!Ghana in, USA out!Wooooo hoooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Women Rule ! said...


ok, when men go thru the nine months of bloating,nausea, swollen ankles, labour pains et al...then and only then can the same accolades be given to you inferior ( he he he ) beings

But until then...kwendeni huko !
and no I have no beef against men or fathers loool !

Movie Buff said...

Commenting on the PS part..... GHANA eeeeee.... GHANA... aaaaaa.... GHANA ROCKS!!!

Will come back later... :).......

Msanii_XL said...

Uppp!!! for GHANA....

The disdain for PA's I think is hardly an issues that bothers Them/ long as you know where you are. Forget the dumb asses that seek to paint the men as..deadbeats and the prolly reaching with some example too

about the dowd book..porojo!

@Devious one...boooo

acolyte said...

@ deviousone
Congrats!I didn't know that women were haemaphrodites and mated with themselves to reproduce?Where have I been all this time?
@ movie buff
I will be waiting!
@ msanii
Ghana mbele!Well do you know that the young take alot of their cues from what they see on TV.So if you have kids and they see dads being dissed odds are they will diss you too as it seems to be the acceptable thing.But you are entitled to your own opinions.

Msanii_XL said...

lol..I carries the big stick. On the real though this one of those double standards MEN will never the golf one..Wie can try to play in mens' compe, if man tries that in LPGA the shrills that follow..

Black Widow Spider said...

wee msaani wacha siasa ! wacha till U shit a baby out of your womb then we see..until then..U shikilia your golf club..same goes to you Aco ( insert evil laugh )

Haemaphrodites we're not but we can use you beings for sperm donor purposes and leave it at for me, I've taken the black widow's spider mantra..mate then eat the victim bweheheheheheheheheh !

Msanii_XL said...

So in essence you are telling me to play my position..bwehehehehehe?

Since I read somwhere you are not of the having kids persuasion, whats your crutch in this baby spitting business?

Don't forget the ketchup when eating the mate..

acolyte said...

@ msanii
Well it is true that there are some double standards that men may never win but wait for round 2!
@ black widow
My arguement has nothing to do with the whole biological process of birthing, besides with our knowledge we will soon make artificial wombs and render you obsolete, my arguement is about the neccesity of fathers as a nurturing force.Anyway it seems you want to eat Msanii so bon appetit!

Rista said...

Aco, re: artificial wombs... please don't hold your breath, baking a baby is beyond science, it's divine.
Last i checked, sperm is what makes a baby possible, if guys were more careful about where theirs went, there would be no need for these discussions.

Archer said...

Sup Acolyte, thanks 4 linking to my post in your article. I didnt think the issue would create this much interest! Mimi sina la ziada, I said all I needed to say in my post. Cheers!

Prousette said...

To answer your question, Yes. If only they took time to bond with their offspring it would be easier for them to be remembered on father's day.
So now we are going to refer to retailers when judging the warmth and importance of holidays. Are you forgeting that these people are in the business of making money and that statement would be geared towards sending people who have neglected their fathers on a guilt trip?

Go Ghana!!! at least there is one good thing from this world cup what with some of us widowed.

acolyte said...

@ rista
Last i checked, sperm is what makes a baby possible, if guys were more careful about where theirs went, there would be no need for these discussions.
Thank you for this one sided myopic answer that adds little to the discussion.But it would be rude of me not to reply in kind
If women were careful about who they opened their legs to and when there would be no need for these discussions.
@ archer
You are most welcome!
@ prou
I do understand that more men should bond with their children but even good fathers are often overlooked during father's day.Fact is that fatherhood has been rendered a far second and dispenisble by society.Thank you for giving one of the few in depth comments to this thread.