There are several statements a man can tell a woman that just destroy a man's ego ie Is it in yet?You only make that much?I thought you could do better. But none hit home like this one, "You're such a nice guy!"If a chic you are hitting on as a jamaa ever tells you that, my guy pack your bags and move on because chances are high that the next thing you will hear after laying down your best game is "Let's just be friends."I have to admit in my younger days I was a recipient of one of these and I say that it's like a stake to the heart when you're young but whatever doesn't kill you will only make you stronger.
Well this for me doesn't make sense to me is that these are the same women who will be running around moaning about how they need a good man?!But I will concede that there are some guys who are too nice that even I as a guy want to slap some sense into them they are the ones who get comments like “oh, he’s too nice to date”.The kind of guys who will do anything that a chic asks them to and seem to have no ego whatsoever.Also I find it interesting how women say they want a man who will listen to them as not too many men do, but many times when a guy goes out of his way to listen he is labelled as a pal so there is no way he's hooking up.Women seem to have an addiction to a male ear that will listen and never want to change the status quo by dating the guy.Well gals I have to tell you something, there are guys who will listen to you but when a gal wants you to sit with her for three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner if you agree and have any intentions you are shooting yourself in the foot say no and walk away.
So what have I learned over the years by observing this volatile creature called woman?Be nice but not too nice, learn to say no, be selfish and be your own man.Ladies I am sorry that you are finding it hard to find nice guys but you brought it upon yourselves.
Anyway insted of ranting and as a weekend treat I will serialise some emails and show you how guys are put in the nice guy mould and how one man fought his way out of the system!Airing next on FOX!!!These e-mails may be real or fake figure it out!Let me set the scene for you.This guy has known this chic for a short time but before he could get to spend time he left town and did not get to hear from her till some months down the line.I will try and build the scene and leave out the boring mails that don't add to the plot...
This is from an earlier correspondence.The man hasn't shown that he has a good listening facility yet..
Hi,
Thanks for the humour, liked it. You've been rather quiet, it was nice to hear from you at long last. For me things are so-so, no changes to talk about. The office has been unusually quiet, my boss has been ill, still is. Its a lil bit worrying and I could use some cheering. Can you think of anything? The stuff you used to tell me about that place spiced up my mail some. Tell me about the stuff Im yet to know about, since I live in the African jungle? I am sure there are a few. The skies threaten to unleash rain then recede and for the past few weeks we've dressed for rain then end up baring it all for the heat, but the umbrellas are kept at a handy distance. I hope it is going to fall for real soon. How are things going with you? It must be pretty chilly by now. What's happening? Are guys preparing for Christmas? Got to run. Enjoy the rest of your day.
Caroline
As you can see that is a pretty routine e-mail.Here is guy's response to that email.
Hi!
I will look for some more fun stuff to send you.Usually I dont send too many forwards as I dont want to clog up someone's in box.Well enjoy the peace while it lasts as your boss will be back sooner then you think.As for weather it is beginning to get chilly here and that means that winter isnt too far away.Damn!At least it does not snow here it jsut gets very cold.Anyway it is a monday so not much to say.I hear things are really hot on the orange and banana scene!What's your opinion on it all?
Bye!
Next Caroline discovers that she may have a listener on her hands what will she do.Stay tuned as we discover the idiosyncracies between men and women
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12 comments:
ok first here again..but i'll be back with somethin of substance...and what u mean sleep with one eye open...do u remember who owns the room ur sleepin in..ebu i call up milo and we ganag up on u sawa sawa...hata msanii will be on our side once the pee dries up!
ok now substance!
i had a chic and just when i thought everything was goin well..she gave me a valentines card signed "Love XXX (J.A.F)"
ati just a friend the nerve on a card and kwanza in initials...
@ nick aka 'couch tato
pole sana!The worst thing with chics is that it is always calmest b4 the storm!You are down for the count b4 u know what has happened!
If you're too good to us...we take you for granted (its sad but a fact too) and that's one thing you wouldn't want.
In a nutshell, if you see a lady running to you only when in trouble or when she is drunk or when in problems or bored/lonely....RUN DUDE RUN!!!
You'll be another case of, "Let's be friends or You're so cute/nice!! Why?? Cause you're so accommodating and we need to run to you during such times...and you're always there with open arms/always available....such darlings :)
I know I used to do it...so why not share with the male species coz ya'll are the recipients of such! But again, maybe that's just me...
NB: They're great guys and I love them to bits but that's as far as it goes...
good post! that email ni ya ukweli..lakini chics can be mean just like jamaaz! I guess we are equal in that sense. I also think jamaaz know when a chic aint wanting nothing. you guys stick around just to make sure!
lol @ 'is it in?' Reminded me of my first encounter...yes I asked! Kwani? I didn't know!! Talk about tinyness.
You are right tho. We as women are always complaining that guys don't do this or that then when they do it, we're like 'ooh it's too much...he needs to give me space; can u not call me for 12 hrs? give me time to miss u; ama relax with the flowers dude!'
Don't even get me started on the 'Yes' men!
hmmmmm, just a friend .... it does happen, but it can be a bit confusing after that whole "do i fancy you or not" routine that guys and girls always go through. there are things that friends should do for each other regardless of gender. lakini do not under any circumstances let a woman walk all over you - women respect a man who can stand up for himself by saying he wont spend hours analysing one phrase ... even as a chile i would tell her to style the hell up!
woiye nick at J.A.F ... ouch!
lol teejay ... ati "is it in?" poor dude, you probably scared him for life!
@ k.i.d.a.d.a
I fell you 110% and thank you for confirming what I thought.Being nice doesnt get you anywhere!!But on the other hand don't be jerk!!Very confusing!!
@ mutumia
Thank God I passed thru all of that when I was young and stupid.Siku hizi if the desired results aren't rendered in the given time frame a brother moves on and the attention that the gal was getting is turned off!I should tell you about the 3 point plan one of these fine days :D
@ farmgal
well i have no comment about if the email is real or fake read the next ones and then you will know tha situation.On the other hand there are some jamaas who have no idea that the chic has no plans for them!Poor bastards!
@ tee j
Oh my you probably scarred some young chap for life!!
@ spicebear
Yes a man needs a backbone and shouldn't give a chic the chance to treat him like one of the gals.That's the cue for you to bail out as a jamaa.Poor nick was tormented and Tee J was a tormentor.Lesson of the day as the ladies have confirmed be hard ( and large if your goin to Tee J's bedroom ) and in charge!!
Hmmmm
I think its about being a bit smart..
The vulture is a patient bird.. Learning how to gauge when to be there for her when she genuinely needs you rather than we she just wants you around... It can work wonders up to the point when Tee J asks if its in yet... LOLOLOLOL.. at that point its "kila mtu na demu wake"
@ milo
I agree patience is most def a virtue in this game!You've got to know when you are needed and wanted and act accordingly
Kwani what is wrong with being a friend if that is what I want from you dude? I'll skip the just bit and tell you friend period.
The only problem is jamaa having hidden intentions that surface after pretending to be a friend..
@ prou
I agree with nuthin wrong with a guy being a friend.but what is mboff is when the dude is doing all the stuff that guys do for chic they are dating so the chic should have an idea where things are headed but instead she just enjoys the attention then puts him down like a rabid dog.:(
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